Your 30s are typically a time for
settling down after using your 20s to take risks and find yourself.
Many 30-somethings are busy raising
a family and rising through the hierarchy at work.
Those who have already been through
that decade say that as their responsibilities accumulated, it became easier to
neglect relationships and ignore opportunities that they would never get again.
Quora users discussed lessons they
learned in the thread: "What is the biggest mistake you made in your 30s and what
did you learn from it?"
We've collected some of the best
responses:
They
abandon their loftier aspirations.
Twenty-somethings are often willing
to settle for a job they are not passionate about, but before they know it,
that job turns into their career. An anonymous poster writes that his or her biggest
mistake of his or her 30s was to become "addicted to a monthly
salary," in the sense that he or she settled for job security over career
satisfaction.
If you've ever wanted to start a
business or pursue a side project, it will only get more difficult as your
responsibilities increase.
They
put their career ahead of family and friends.
"Don't just work. Make
memories. The older you get, the harder it is to make meaningful relationships.
Foster those while you're young," writes Microsoft product designer Michael Dorian Bach,
who is now in his late 30s.
They
neglect their health.
Bach writes that the pursuit of a career can also
be a drain on one's health. "Be healthy. That is priority 1. Don't get
into your 30s being slow and tired all the time. It sucks," he says.
Develop an exercise routine, and enjoy your mobility while you're still young.
They
miss the chance to have kids.
CEO coach Alison Whitmire
shares a personal story about how she took getting pregnant for granted in her
30s and chose to pursue a new career opportunity instead of trying to have a
child. Years later, after a failed pregnancy and then a failed marriage, she
remarried and had a baby at 43. She realizes now that no one is ever adequately
prepared to have a child, and if you want one, it's best to do so before it's
too late.
They
don't spend enough time with their aging parents.
Entrepreneur and blogger James Altucher,
who is now 46, writes about a particularly difficult memory for him: "When
I was 34 I hung up the phone on my dad in an argument and never returned his
calls. Six months later he had a stroke and died. A week before that he had
emailed me to say hello but I didn't return the email. I'm sorry, Dad."
It can be easy to forget that your
parents grow older as you do. Don't take them for granted.
They
don't set up a financial foundation for the future.
Altucher writes about the many times in his 30s
he bet practically all of his money on a business venture and then lost all of
it. Altucher is doing well now, but he looks back on his failures as the result
of recklessness.
As your responsibilities grow, it
can seem like what you put into savings won't amount to much come retirement,
but it will only become harder to start saving in your 40s.
They
stop having fun.
Just because you're not in your 20s
anymore doesn't mean you need to give up enjoying life. Bach says he spent
the early half of his adult life chasing money, and it only made him unhappy
and more cynical about life.
Go on dates with your significant
other. Take your kids on trips. Go to concerts with your best friends. Just
don't forget that the money you work to make is useless if you're miserable.
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